I've Walked My Own Talk

Nigel Reed is a man who has struggled for most of his life with not knowing where his place in life was supposed to be which oft times lead to bouts of depression. His one desire was to have his own family unit. Though married several times he only ever had the one child; a little girl called Zoë who unfortunately was born with Cystic Fibrosis and suffered from Asthma. Before Zoë died Nigel started to walk for charity. As Zoë was dying, Nigel promised her that he would walk all around the world to inform people of the plight of families affected by life limiting illnesses. This is Nigel’s amazing story of keeping a promise while fighting depression and being thwarted by several people who had the Cuckoo Syndrome. The Cuckoo Syndrome being people who wait for one person to do the hard work then swoop in and take control and all the glory. Read on to see how Nigel deals with life’s challenges. At 15 years of age. I later read somewhere that everything started with a day dream, even creation. How I wish I had read and understood that sooner. I knew nothing about how to achieve a dream. I expected to spend my adult life in the steel mills like my father’s family. So having left school with no clear direction, for one year I drifted from job to job as a furnace worker, painter and steel worker. When anyone told me I had done something wrong at work, I quit. In my early 30’s. Stanley was still alive when I left to go back to Townsville. Within 20 minutes of setting down on Australian soil, Janet announced that she was leaving me. This announcement, coming so soon after seeing Stanley and my mum, was almost too much for me. I had never experienced such a sense of loss. Janet was shocked at my reaction, believing in some way that I wanted the marriage to end. After some discussion she mentioned trying again, but my thoughts made me wonder how she could swing from not being in love to trying again. We had been married for five years and all for what. I was confused and troubled and decided against it. So it was back to England for me. In my forties. I looked forward to her smile when I picked her up from school. She would say “Hi Day”! Day was her way of shortening Daddy. My visits to her school were always a positive experience. I’ll never forget the day of the Sports Carnival. Zoe had been selected to race in the 100-metre dash. She had come through the heats and made it to the finals. She lined up against some young, naturally gifted kids and came in last. She ran over to me almost in tears and said, "I got beat, Day"! I replied, “No my mate, you are the winner. Don’t forget that you only have 46% lung function and the others have a normal lung function. You are a winner”. Her whole life was about beating death. She probably knew that she was never going to win races. The lesson I learned on that day was a simple one: Be prepared to go the distance, for it’s your contribution to life that matters. Be aware that others are watching. Your courage may help them. In my fifties. I suddenly thought of Barbara and asked how she was. Margaret’s face changed and she replied very quietly, “Barb’s dead”. She died some years before from cancer of the cervix. I felt numb and was unable to respond, and then slowly the tears started to run down my face. It was hard to believe that in a period of two days I had learned that I’d lost two good friends. “What about her family”? I asked. She said that they were all there with her when she finally passed away. It was about five miles to walk and during that time I could not stop from thinking that even if I had married my childhood sweetheart, today I would still be on my own. It was as if no matter which direction I had gone in, I would have had to aid people dealing with death. I touched down on American soil on April 11 1995 at Dulles International Airport in Washington DC. I had no idea what to expect and I was full of apprehension about the next day or two. There had been some good contacts made and if the United Kingdom was an indication of how Lions would respond, I was in for one great journey. But I was still scared. Taking the first step on any journey into the unknown is hard, and knowing my financial support was in the hands of the Rochedale and Springwood Lions Clubs seemed like a huge gamble. The first challenge to overcome was the customs official. She had difficulty understanding how I was being cared for by so many Lions Clubs. It took a lot of convincing on my part as I had very little cash on me, and I had to make her believe that I would be able to care for myself whilst in the United States. Finally I convinced her it was a charity walk and that I was staying with a fellow Lion’s member here in Washington. Ay 59 years of age. That night we went out to dinner. By now there was no doubt that we were getting along well and I knew I wanted to meet her again. I survived the near financial disaster of that evening and when we left each other that night we agreed to meet again. I knew Jocelyn was going to be special to me and I had to see her again. With still another week until payday and having no money; I sold my camping gear. The next date was even better than the first.